Loading ...

In the beginning

When I first started mountain biking, like many other beginners I just rode around in a pair of gym shorts and a t-shirt.  If you’re a seasoned cyclist, you just did a facepalm because you know what just went on down in the nether area.  If you’re not a cyclist…I’m not sure why you’re even at my blog (wait – I know, it’s because I’m devilishly handsome.  I get it, it happens).

If you are still clueless what I’m talking about, friction and soft tissue is not most pleasant of combinations.  You get some of your cotton bvd’s, a hot Alabama day and a few hours in the saddle and well… let’s just say you’re walking like a cowboy for the next few weeks.

As time passed I moved to wearing what’s called “baggies” which are shorts with the built-in padding.  I was happy with my baggies, baggies were my friends as they had pockets and…well good lord they didn’t reveal your…everything.

A friend of mine, let’s say her name is Macy Gravis was talking about the wonders and greatness of skin-tight lycra and how you could move easier and faster with it, especially if you got a bib.

A bib has suspenders built into it, and it’s what babies, hipsters and really old men wear…except that a biker’s bib leaves no room for the imagination.  You just put it all out there and feel practically naked.

Macy told me that only the cool people wear bibs and that I wouldn’t be accepted into any of the cool-kid-clubs if I didn’t wear one.  So I made the mistake of looking online and getting the cheapest bib I could find which was a baby blue one.  It came in the mail and fit fairly well and I figured NOW I’ll be awesome on the trail.

Three things happened

1. I was the laughing stock of the trail
2. see #1
3. speaking of #1 – it’s a pain in a bib…god help you if you have to go down any further down the numeric system. (yeah, bibs don’t have little zippers or flaps)

Actually Macy did most of the laughing at me, but it was enough!  And I guess in a sense she was right – shopping online to find the cheapest deal on a cheap bib ended up with something that fell apart and a baby blue color.  It was so embarrassing!

Enter the Bonty

I got my hands on a Bontrager bike kit and I have to admit – quality is quality.  It fits like a glove and feels amazing!  Apparently the Bontworkers worked pretty hard at getting this thing pretty damned near perfect.  And I’m not lying! It airs out well, it’s very breathable and you look extremely sexy in it!

I mean you go from this:

to this!

No, really.  It’s nice, and you do look pretty cool in it and let’s face it – mountain bikers are as vain as hell – so you might as well get something that looks hellishly vain, right?

It also lands you hot chicks… it’s how I met my wife!

The good and bad

Here is a list of pros and cons about the Bontrager Bike kit.  You can see facts and figures that will help you decide if that kit is for you…

phsaw, whatever.  You want science, data and numbers?  Then go look at the jersey here, and the bib here.  I don’t do all that stuff, I’m way too ADD to sit and list all those tehnical things.  So I made my own Pros and Cons:

Pros:

• The legs and arms are banded so they don’t ride up
• It’s roomy and feels really great against your skin (no really, it does.  The cheap crap really is abrasive)
• The nether cushions are really nice against soft tissue
• As you ride by female bikers they are all like “haaaaay baby! You got any organic gluten-free paleo-diet approved fries to go with that shake!?“
• They are pretty durable.        Don’t believe me, come out and ride a technical trail with me

Cons:

I actually only have one real complaint with the kit, and that is that on longer endurance rides, it gets a little uncomfortable against your soft tissue due to the seams.  These would be rides that exceed more than 4-5 hours without breaks.  Anything under that and they are great!

Conclusion

So I know what you’re saying – “Well if Scott wears them, then I HAVE TO HAVE THEM!”  Well of course you do, everyone wants to be like me.  So where could you get your hands on one of these gems?  Well you could order it off the Internet, wait 8-10 days, accidentally get the wrong size, have to ship them back and get the next size up only to find out you like the other size better and then in one month, you’ll be rocking.

Or if you’re in Birmingham, I’d suggest visiting one of Cahaba Cycles stores and picking up a kit there (jersey and the bib).  Not only do you support a local business, but you are supporting people who hold local events, fix your bike, and can give you advice about all your cycling needs.

Boy, that sounded like an ad, right?  But it’s true, really.  Buying locally puts money back into your community and is better for cycling.  Of course if you’re on the Internet, don’t live in Birmingham and want a Bontrager kit – then considering ordering from Cahaba Cycles online as you’ll be supporting us locally.  I’m not really concerned about your town or area anyway…just Birmingham.

Sorry.